Dear Diary,
I cant help but laugh at Lucys outburst this morning. Youre just a meddlesome meddler who loves sticking her nose into other families! she spat, as if Id just waltzed into her life for sport.
It was almost comical.
I burst out laughing. Is that the most ridiculous accusation you could think of? When I met Edward, youd already been divorced for three years. And if Im not mistaken, you left him for another man. Which family am I meddling in?
For a moment Lucy was speechless, then she just stared at the car as I slipped back into the drivers seat and drove off to work. The exchange gave me more of a jolt than any cup of tea could.
Edward had asked me earlier to give Emily a lift to school. Rita, could you drop Emily off? Im running late, hed said, smoothing his sons messy bangs. Id replied, No problem, Ill get her there in one piece. I helped her pack her books, zipped up her backpack, and tucked a quick kiss on her forehead. I loved Edward, and I loved Emily too. Our little household was unconventional, but it suited me just fine.
At school we ran into Lucy again, Edwards exwife, wrapped in a thin trench coat despite the lateautumn chill. She seemed perpetually on edge, as if she lived in a constant fog.
Emily! You forgot your trainers at home, and you have PE today! she shouted, thrusting a bag of shoes into the girls hands. Say thank you to anyone who even remembers you.
Emily ran off without a word, clutching the sneakers, and I watched her disappear down the hallway. As I was about to get back into the car, Lucy turned on me.
Dont you dare get involved with my daughter, she warned, eyes narrowed.
I raised an eyebrow. Excuse me? I asked calmly. Im not intruding. Im just
You teach her, you drive her, you think youre a second mother now? she snapped, the anger in her voice thickening the air.
I kept my composure. Im not trying to replace anyone. I spend time with Emily because shes part of the family. I help her with maths, I take her shopping, Im not pretending she doesnt exist on weekends.
She snarled again, Youre just a meddlesome meddler who loves sticking her nose into other families! and left.
I laughed again, a little too loudly. Youre really trying hard to sound original, arent you? When I met Edward, you were already three years postdivorce. And if memory serves, you left him for another bloke. Which family am I meddling in?
The insult seemed to hit a nerve, but I brushed it off and drove to the office. The confrontation felt oddly refreshingbetter than a morning coffee.
Later that evening, as I polished my boots, Edward asked, Rita, could we talk? Its not a pleasant subject Would you mind if Emily stayed with us for a while longer?
I smiled. Shes already here quite often.
No, I mean permanently, or at least for an extended period.
Sure, I see no problem. As long as it benefits Emily. But why the sudden need? Did Lucy sign off on this? I teased lightly.
He hesitated before answering. Theres a complication Lucy might move in with us as well.
My boot slipped off the floor. And whats your exwife doing here? Are you saying were done, that you want to move back in with her?
He rushed, No! Absolutely not! I cant stand her! I love you! He lifted the boot, scrubbed it furiously, as if trying to erase all the stress. She was dumped by the man she left Edward for, and now shes got only a week to find a place. Renting in London is outrageously expensive.
I snapped, Then she should go back to her parents!
He lives far away. If she goes, Emily would have to change schools, maybe even move towns. And Lucy wont go without Emily. Our flat has three bedrooms; we can all fit.
Fit? I repeated, halflaughing, halfdreading. All of us under one roof?
He laughed nervously, It sounds a bit mad, but I dont see any other options. We cant afford a separate flat for her, and I cant see Emily only once every six months.
I muttered fit in my head, feeling the grime of the day on my hands, and went back to the kitchen to finish scrubbing.
And so we did. The flat became a cramped battlefield of belongings. Lucys stuff began to fill every corner.
Rita, she said from the living room where she now slept, could you move that vase? It blocks the TV.
The vase sat on the coffee table, hardly in the way. Lucy, its
Just move it. I want to watch the news.
Cant you see Im not the one who put it there? I asked.
Its yours, after all. I cant touch your things without asking.
I shifted the vase carefully. Thanks.
Next came the curtains, which Lucy had tossed in a basket while I was out shopping. Whats the point of these curtains? I asked, holding up the pale drapes.
Theyre the light ones I chose. I want them back, she replied.
Are you now upset that Im handling your belongings?
I thought youd be fine with it, she muttered.
I replied, We chose those curtains together with Edward.
Fine, I dont like them. Ill ask Edward to replace them tomorrow, she said, already planning a fresh look for the flat.
It felt like a domestic circus. Lucy rearranged the kitchen, moving pans to the oven, spices to the top shelf because she never used them. She changed the laundry schedule to once a week to save water, yet the washing machine ran five or six times a day.
Rita, she would pop up unexpectedly, could you please take your perfume off the hallway table? I need space for my cosmetics.
Theyre not in the way, I replied.
They are! I live here too, and I need to be comfortable, she insisted.
Its my home as well, I said, but she seemed deaf to my words.
Youre nobody here, she shot back. This is my house, my man, my family. Youre just a side effect.
I relayed every word to Edward later. When will you sort out the housing for Lucy and Emily? Im fine with Emily staying, but Lucy told me Im nothing. Thats my home too, isnt it?
He tried to smooth things over. Rita, youve misunderstood. Lucys going through a tough time, but she wouldnt say those things. Shes just nervous, maybe said something offhand.
Nervous? She said it straight to my face! I retorted.
What do you suggest? Throw her out? he asked, choosing her side.
Each day Edward spent more time with both Lucy and Emily. They walked together, joked in ways I didnt get. I felt increasingly like an unwelcome guest.
The perfect picture of Edward and Lucys reconciled life didnt last long. A tiny spat erupted over a misplaced teacup. Lucy berated him, You know I hate it when you leave a cup like that! Look at the spill, now I have to change the tablecloth!
I didnt do anything wrong! Edward stammered. I was just drinking tea.
Lucy thundered, And you cant even set a cup properly! My nerves are not a joke.
From the next room, Emily piped up, Dad and Mum are fighting again. Its strange how nice it felt when they split up.
That was the moment I realised I wasnt part of a family at all. I was simply a temporary tenant in a house that kept reshaping itself.
The next day, as I was packing my things, Lucy decided it was time for a deep clean. She started rearranging the books on the livingroom shelf, moving them purely for aesthetic reasons. I, being a tidy person, had my books organised alphabetically and by genre.
She brushed past my system, saying, I just love the look of the spines together.
I laughed weakly, Are you trying to evict my spirit from this place?
Just love a tidy space, she replied, polishing a volume. Your collection looks like a mess.
Its arranged for convenience, so I can find a book quickly, I answered.
I look for books by cover, she said, its more pleasant that way.
It became clear we could never coexist peacefully.
When I finally got into the car, I saw Emily standing at the window, waving goodbye. For a heartbeat I thought she might try to run after me caught between two worlds.
Shall we go? asked my brother, who had arrived to help with the move.
Yes, I replied, pressing the accelerator. The road stretched ahead, and I felt the weight of the day lift, even if only a little.
