28October2025 My diary
I still cant shake the image of Toms face when he finally said the words that have haunted me since childhood. Im sorry, Simon, but I Ive fallen in love with your wife. He muttered it while staring off into the kitchen window, as if the sentence had slipped out of his mouth against his will.
Simon froze. A whole spectrum of emotions flickered across his features; I could see his breath catch.
Believe me, nothing ever happened between us, Tom rushed on, eyes darting away, Ethel doesnt even suspect a thing.
Silence stretched. Time seemed to suspend itself.
And when did you decide I needed to hear this? Simon asked, his tone flat and cold.
Were friends, arent we? Tom replied, still avoiding eye contact, I thought youd tell me what to do. His voice trembled, betraying the turmoil inside.
You want advice from me? Simons bitterness came through as he managed a sour smile, Youve slept with my wife and now you expect my blessing? Brilliant!
No, youve got it wrong! If I wanted her, Id have taken her. You know me. But I cant. Youre like a brother to me.
A brother? Simon rose from the sofa, his anger flaring, Remember when you ran off with Daisy from Victors flat? We swore eternal friendship back then.
Ah, you remembered! That was at school, wasnt it? Ethel is a different story.
Exactly. Shes my wifeand shes pregnant, if you havent noticed. So get out of our lives.
Seriously? Youd betray our friendship for a woman? Simons voice trembled with disbelief and hurt.
Because its about my family, not just a fling. Do you think its fair to accuse me of betrayal?
Didnt you start this? Tom snapped, his tone dripping with venomous friendship. Take Ethel to the cinema, Im busy, Help her with the renovation, Drive her to her parents. You handed me your own wife! I liked being useful, you know?
Leave, Simon flung the door wide open, his composure unsettlingly calm. And dont come back. Forget us.
Alright, Tom said, a bitter smile playing on his lips. I expected a different conversation, but now my conscience is clear.
The door slammed, and Tom disappeared down the hallway. As soon as it closed, he dialed Ethels number.
Ethel, we need to meet. Its important.
Whats happened? she sounded nervous. Come over, Simons still at work. Well wait together.
I cant. He he told me Im not welcome here.
What? Why?
I dont know. I thought youd explain.
Im confused, Ethel admitted, lets meet in the park then.
They met under the old oak. She listened without interrupting while Tom recounted how Simon had erupted, threw vague accusations, and spoke of a nonexistent affair between them. He didnt lie; he simply omitted the crucial details.
Your husband thinks Im tearing your family apart, Tom concluded, fixing his gaze on her bewildered eyes.
Thats nonsense, she whispered.
Simons just jealous, Tom said gently. Did you ever notice?
He could see the puzzle forming in her mind: sudden questions from Simon, his irritation with friends, constant suspicionperfect soil for doubt.
What should I do? she asked, voice trembling.
Talk to him. Tell him hes wrong, that were just friends.
He wont believe you.
Then say nothing. Stay with me tonight. Let him feel what its like to be alone.
Ethel looked frightened, her eyes a battlefield of doubt, fear, resentment, and something newdanger.
Okay, she finally said. But Im counting on your integrity.
The first step was taken.
All evening Tom played the concerned friend. They drank tea, swapped funny anecdotes, and he watched her stareconfused at first, then intrigued. When she fell asleep on the couch, he didnt wake her.
The next morning, Simon called, his voice hoarse from lack of sleep.
Ethel there?
Yes, Tom answered without blinking. Alls well. She just decided not to return.
Silence lingered. Tom pictured Simons face and felt a cold satisfaction.
Tell her the door is closed. Forever, Simons words trailed off, as if searching for the right phrasing.
Tom hung up.
Ethel awoke to the conversation.
What happened?
Simon he doesnt want to see you any more. He said you made your choice.
She broke down. Tom held her, murmuring empty comforts, though none reached his heart. Why should she mourn a past happiness that he had so easily shattered?
A week later Ethel packed her things.
Im going to my mothers, she said without looking at him. I need time alone to think.
Of course, Tom replied, nodding. Go.
She left, whispering, I no longer trust you, Simon, or anyone around you
***
Now the flat sits empty, the silence pressing down, turning thoughts inside out.
The planso neat, so eleganthas cracked. She was supposed to be torn between us. I intended to torment Simon, keep her close, savour his humiliation. Yet she left and ruined everything.
***
I collapsed onto the sofa, staring at the ceiling. Childhood memories surged. Simon, the perpetual lucky charm, always scoring the winning goal, breezing through exams, catching every girls eye. Everything came easy to him.
Jealousy had been a slowburning ember for years, sour, until it turned into outright hatred.
Life scattered us, and then a chance encounter reignited the old, unspoken rage.
Now Simon is a successful entrepreneur, with a beautiful wife and a baby on the way. His serene smile, his quiet confidence about the futurethese stirred the dormant malice.
I could no longer endure it. I wanted, impossibly, to knock the smugness off his shoulders, to snatch a crumb of his happiness, even if only for a moment. I never imagined it would be so simple.
***
The phone rang, breaking the hush. An unknown number. A voice announced a crash. Ethel had been in a car accident on her way to her mothers.
I sat stunned, unable to move. This was no longer a cunning plot, no longer revenge. It was catastrophe.
***
Simon, learning of the accident, spent days and nights at the hospital.
When Ethel, through tears and pain, finally told him everythinghow shed been persuaded that Simon was unjustly jealous, how shed been coaxed to stay just to talk, all to teach him a lessonSimon held her hand tightly.
His concern was no longer about the scheme; it was that his wife was alive. He realised he could have lost her forever.
A few days later Simon returned home to change. By the buildings entrance stood the childhood friendme. My face was ashen, eyes darting.
How is she? I asked, voice cracking.
Simon, exhausted, with a hollow stare, answered simply, meaning the loss of their unborn child:
Its over.
I grew paler. It seemed Ethel was gone.
I didnt mean it! the words poured out like a flood. I was just jealousalways have been! Youve had everything; Ive had nothing! I saw your happiness and I couldnt stand it! I decided I wanted to teach you, to ruin your family, so youd suffer! I never imagined shed leave, that it would end like this! I never wanted her dead!
Simon listened in silence to my frantic, broken confession, then said:
I never expected anything good from you, but youve surprised me. You finally admitted everything. Does it feel lighter?
Sorry, I croaked. I never thought it would go this far
Think more often, Simon retorted dryly. People say it helps. Thats all, goodbye.
He walked away into the stairwell.
I remained there, alone, unsure which direction to take. Eventually, with a heavy heart, I started to move forward, step by uncertain step.
