A Strange Exchange
Mornings in the Chandler household always seemed to slip through cracks in time. On this particular day, Alice and Edward awoke late, as if some invisible English fog had smothered the chimes of their alarm clock. Both scrambled about their flat in Bournemouth: Alice tumbling through trousers and Thomas tiny socks, stuffing nappies and a faded Thomas the Tank Engine into a backpack for nursery; Edward weaving between rooms, half-buttoned, muttering about misplaced keys.
Ed, youre picking up Thomas today, yes? Alice called, her voice muffled by a shirt yanked over her head.
Alright! came Edwards reply from the hallway. Have you seen my keys?
I havent! Alice snapped, scanning every surface for her phone, as if it might emerge from thin air like biscuits on a windswept beach.
She swooped down to dress Thomas, who, unfazed by chaos, drove a Matchbox Jaguar in looping circuits over the faded carpet.
In five surreal minutes, Alice and Thomas floated through the swirling streets to the nursery, clouds dangling just above their heads. She fought with his coat zip stubbornly jammed as Thomas blue eyes pooled with tears.
Mummy, please, dont make me go! he whimpered, furrowing his brow and balling his chubby fists.
Alice knelt, smoothing his hair, every fretful motion like moving through honey. Sweetheart, its only for today. Your friends are waiting, there are toys, and jam tarts
A nursery worker glided over, her smile so tranquil it seemed painted on. Dont worry, Alice. Well have him right as rain. Come along, Thomas.
Relief fluttered in Alices chest, but then panic swooped back as she glanced at her watch. Im frightfully late absolute shambles. She pulled her bag open to ring a client, but the phone in her hand wasnt hers. Edwardsidentical black case, identical daft password. Cursed matching covers, cursed absent-mindedness.
Splendid, she muttered, mind spinning for a solution. Shed have to ring her own number, beg Edward to send the right contact.
Vibrations buzzed in her palm, an unfamiliar message flashing up:
Dave: Did it work out with that girl at the gym? Has she given you her number?
Alice blinked, the words blurring on the screen, her mind heavy and dream-thick. She opened the messages, reading as if they were written on steam:
Dave: So, did you win her trust?
Edward: Yeah, shes given me her number. We sorted it for this weekend. At mine.
Alice read the exchange over and again, like a record stuck on a loop. *This weekend?* She was meant to take Thomas to her mothers for an overnight stay.
Good heavens she whispered, the world shrinking to a pinprick. Cursed matching phone covers, cursed everything.
Going through the motions each day, pretending ignorance was like holding her breath under the Thames. Edward noticed nothing amisshe asked about her day, helped with tea, tucked Thomas in, making life seem perfectly ordinary. But Alice watched him, searching his eyes for a flicker of guilt, finding only the steady calm of a summer meadow. His innocence frightened her more than anything.
Wednesday evening, they watched a film together, Edwards arm around her shoulders. Alice bit her lip, stifling sobs, feeling as exposed as a deer in high beams. Each casual touch now felt rehearsed, as though hed learnt affection by rote.
Friday, with Thomas asleep, Alice stood at the sink, running her finger along the trickle of tapwater. Edward hugged her from behind, voice soft:
You seem a bit down tonight. You alright?
Her skin prickled with cold. Im fine, just tired, thats all. She tried to smile, but her jaw quivered.
Edward brushed her hair off her neck, kissed her head. Alright. He went back to stacking plates as if nothing was wrong.
That night, listening to soft snoring, Alice slipped from bed and locked herself in the bathroom. She perched on the tubs edge, hot tears threading down her cheeks. Why? she mouthed against her knees. Why?
But answers shimmered always out of reach, like stones under water.
What now? Should she confront him, or walk away in silence?
By dawn she knew: shed have to wear the mask until all was revealed.
On Saturday morning Alice drove Thomas to her mothers Edwardian cottage, nestled beneath rain-heavy boughs. She felt like a puppet strung by invisible hands, every gesture awkward.
Darling, is everything alright? her mother questioned, her voice warm as bread.
Alice attempted a breezy laugh. All fine, Mum. Imjust off to surprise Edward. Was in the area. She kissed Thomas on the forehead and fled, terrified shed dissolve into tears if she lingered.
Back in her battered Vauxhall, the drive home unravelled in fevered slow-motion. *What if hes only meeting Dave? What if Ive misunderstood? What ifoh, but what if not?* The questions ran round like foxes at dusk.
Pulling up at their flat, she sat behind the wheel, adrift. Images floated by: picnics in Hyde Park, clumsy laughter at the Sunday roast, bedtime stories. She lingered in the car, stretching the seconds as though stubbornly holding back the tide.
Finally, she went upstairs, one step at a time, key trembling in her hand. She slipped it into the lock, turning it slowly, as if putting off the world on the other side.
Within, the kitchen glowed with the weak golden light of a standing lamp. She heard muffled laughter, the indistinct voices trailing along the corridor like lost children. Every muscle resisted, but she walked towards the noise as though bewitched.
Edward? she called, her voice filtered through tin and glass.
Edward! she repeated, louder, but still ghostlike.
She stepped into the kitchen. Two people: a woman, and DaveEdwards best mate. For a heartbeat, time stuttered. Dave jumped up, face crimson.
Alice! Wait, its not what it looks like. Swear on me life! I couldn’t have her at my mums, you know how it is! Honestly, Alice
But his words tangled and faded, Alice hearing only a watery rush. She watched their shapes blur and swirl. A sob wriggled from her somewhere, but somehow she found herself grinning.
I see, Dave… she said gently, emotions surging and breaking. I’m going.
She turned. Cool air bit her face. She opened Edwards phone and, with a shaking thumb, dialed his number.
Hello? Edwards voice echoed, far away.
She wanted to say something grand, but only managed, I love you…very much
Tears chased each other down her cheeks, and odd, splintered laughter escaped.
I was at home Daves there she whispered.
Oh Right. Dont be upset, love, please. Im at the office, really. Come here, will you, darling? You know what Daves like. Will you come?
Im on my way
She speeded off across the city, desperate to find Edward, to untangle the knot in her heart.
At the office, in the empty conference room, Alice and Edward sat cross-legged on the rug, an open bottle of wine between them. Alice leaned on his shoulder, clutching a glass as if for warmth.
Sorry, she began, I never shouldve peeked at your messagesI never have before
Edward sighed. Its me who ought to say sorry. Shouldnt have dragged you into Daves nonsense. I shouldve told you from the off, no secrets between us.
Why did he ask you to help? Alice wondered.
Hes my mate. He made a proper fool of himself in front of that gym girl.
How?
He snorted, dragging his hands through his hair. He spilt energy drink all over her lovely white suit. Stained the poor girl blue. After that he went full adolescent, begged me to help him save face.
Edward put on a dopey voice, acting the part. Alice cackled.
Theres thirty years of friendship for you. I guess Im the only one he feels okay being his worst self with.
Remind mewhys Dave still living with his mum? Alice grinned.
To save money… And for her cottage pie, and the way she does his laundry and irons his socks.
Exactly. Edward arched an eyebrow at her.
Hes so tight! Alice declared, laughing so hard she nearly spilled her wine.
Edward grinned. But Im not, am I? And we deserve a bit of romance. Come with melets book somewhere nice.
She blinked. A hotel?
Edward nodded, then swept her up and carried her across the room, Alice giggling like a schoolgirl, trying to wriggle away as Edward held her close.
Ill make sure you arrive safe and soundscouts honour!
And Alice howled with laughter, barely believing that only hours ago, shed been certain their world was crumbling, as if inside a dream that makes no sense at all.
