After twentyone years of marriage, one evening my wife, Ethel, turned to me and said, You ought to ask another woman out for dinner and a film. I was taken aback. She smiled and added quietly, I love you, but theres another lady who loves you too and has been waiting for a bit of your time. That other lady was my mother.
Margaret had been living alone for nineteen years since my father died. Work and looking after our three kids ate up so much of my energy that I scarcely saw her any more. That night I rang her up and said, Mum, lets go out for dinner and a movie tomorrow. Just the two of us.
Whats the matter, love? Everything all right? she asked, a little nervous. Mum always thought a sudden call meant bad news. All fine, Mum, I replied. I just want to spend an evening with you. She was silent for a moment, then answered gently, Id love to.
On Friday after work I drove to pick her up. She was already waiting, dressed up, smiling, in the same dress she wore on our wedding anniversary. I told the girls I have a date with my son, she laughed, and theyre all eager to hear how it went. We headed to a small cosy bistro called The Willow. She took my arm, just as tenderly as she used to when I was a child.
When the menu arrived I read it aloud, because the print was tiny for her eyes. I used to read menus to you, she said with a grin. Now its my turn, Mum, I answered. We talked for agesabout life, memories, all the things that had piled up between us over the years. We missed the film, but we didnt mind.
When I drove her home she said, Id like to do this again, but next time Ill be the one to invite. I smiled and agreed. A few days later Margaret suffered a sudden heart attack and died. I never got the chance to say goodbye.
Some weeks later a plain envelope arrived. Inside was a copy of the restaurant bill and a note: I paid in advance. I wasnt sure Id be there, but I wanted to cover a dinner for two for you and your wife. Youll never know how much that night meant to me. Love you, son.
Thats when I realised never to put off saying I love you. Give the people you cherish the time you have. Family isnt something for later; its something for now.
