Friends found out my wife and I were renting out a flat, and now they want to move in. How do we explain that we dont want to rent to friends? These things are always harder to negotiate when its personal.
After our wedding, everything between my wife and me fell into place beautifully. We married with the intention of living with her parents. At the time, my own mum and dad were relocating to the coast, and their old flat was sold, the proceeds split between me and my sister. With that money and a little extra from my father-in-law, we managed to buy a spacious one-bedroom flat. We even put up a partition wall, turning it into two rooms. We thought one might be for a child, but somehow, that never happened.
At first, we just didnt want one. Then our careers took off, leaving little time. Later, we simply couldntmy wife refused to see a doctor, and I wasnt keen either. Still, we were happy together, never worrying too much about whod bring us a glass of water in our old age. Our friends, already knee-deep in debt and misery from raising kids, only confirmed our choice. If this was happiness, we decided we could live without it.
By the time we were thirty-three, we invested in a new-build apartment. The sum wasnt enormous, so we took the risk, despite warnings. By thirty-seven, the place was readyjust a light refurbishment to make it perfect. My wife called it our “insurance policy,” either for a child we might never have or, failing that, for our nephews later on.
For now, we decided to rent it out ourselves, avoiding estate agents. To cast a wider net, we mentioned it to friends, hoping theyd suggest places to advertise. Thats when things turned awkward. One coupleold friends, stuck in a run-down rental with two kids and a catasked if they could move in. A new building, fresh decor, and they even hinted at a friends discount.
Our mistake was telling them in the first place. We never expected this.
Its only one bedroomyour familys too big, my wife tried.
So? Were in a one-bed now. Your photos make yours look roomier.
But its brand-new, and youve got kids and a cat
What, you think were slobs wholl wreck it?
We said wed think it over, though privately, Id already made up my mind. Id seen their placechaos everywhere. Eventually, my wife pushed the unpleasant task of refusal onto me, and I fumbled through weak excuses.
The response was brutal:
Youve got a second flat, your parents will leave you theirs when theyre gone, and still, its never enough! Youll rot in those empty homesno kids, no friends, no joy in your lives!
Was that fair? We owe them nothing. Their choiceskids without a stable home, no family supportarent our burden. Everyone lives as they choose. So why shouldnt we rent to strangers at full price instead of bending for friends?
