Only today we found out that he has an adult daughter who has not spoken to him for over 10 years. All because he did not want to accept her lover. It wasn’t just that he didn’t like it, he’d also issued an ultimatum “either him or her lover.” As you can see, the daughter made a choice and did not forgive her father.
Although we often talked about personal matters at work, Ron always stayed away and did not get into those conversations. Today, which surprised me a lot, he shared what hurts him. We thought he was alone, we felt sorry for him, but not everything was as simple as we thought.
After work, we stayed to celebrate my birthday, drank coffee and ate a cake. We talked about how to grow tomatoes, what preserves are best to make for the winter, how we plan to spend the holidays and about promotions in the nearest store. Here was a personal topic. I was very surprised to learn that Ron has a daughter who is just over thirty years old and has been happily married for a long time.
Ron is a wonderful man, in his 60s, well-groomed, always neat and tastefully dressed, although not very modern. He often goes hiking with his friends, is active, but quite withdrawn. He does not tell anyone about his daughter Mika because he has nothing to say. He knows nothing about her personal life and his grandchildren.
When his wife died suddenly in the mid-1990s, he was left alone with his little daughter. Working in a factory as an engineer, taking care of a small child – it was a real challenge for him. The factory salary was not very good and on top of that the constant delays in payments, and Ron took a risk; he tried his hand at being an engineer in a private company, to which he had been invited for a long time.
The salary was much better and he spent all his money on his daughter: beautiful clothes, tasty and healthy food, studying at a good university. Mika did not regret anything. But in all this he forgot about himself he did not make a personal life for himself, although there were women around him he was always afraid that no one would replace his mother’s daughter. So they lived together.
At the end of his studies, his daughter surprised him she married someone. No, Ron was not against his daughter’s marriage, but he did not agree with her marrying Tom. The boy had behavioral problems, did not study very well and came from a family that was not well off. But my daughter would not listen to anything I said. “I love him now.”
At the beginning, the newlyweds planned to live with Ron, because Tom was from another city. However, after a conversation between the father and his son-in-law, which turned into a quarrel, the young people decided to rent a room and leave their father alone in a three-room apartment. Ron was angry, but he hoped that his daughter would come back to him, but without her lover.
Instead of an accounting career in the company where her father worked, Mika was waiting for a baby. A few years later her professional life now the father still does not know anything about it. He knows that she still lives with Tom, who has not turned out to be as bad as Ron thought. The son-in-law started his own business, made furniture himself, bought a spacious apartment, a good car and every year takes three of his girls; Mika and their two daughters to the seaside.
Ron has tried to reconcile with his daughter many times but in vain, she is too stubborn just like the father. He only saw his granddaughters in the photo on social networks. He buys gifts but does not dare to visit. He is ashamed of himself, and his daughter would not be too happy about it either.
You can see he’s sad and doesn’t know what to do. I do not understand, really is impossible to find a common language with the father? Can you really leave him alone?