The snap of a dry twig under my foot made no sound in my ears. All at once, the world spun around in a dizzying whirl of colour, splintering into a thousand jagged stars that seemed to explode from my left arm, just above the elbow.
Ow I clutched my damaged arm and couldnt stifle a howl of pain.
Jack! My friend Emily darted over and dropped to her knees in front of me. Does it hurt?
No, of course its lovely! I spat between gritted teeth, wincing and trying hard not to let out another whimper.
Emily reached out a tentative hand, gently brushing my shoulder.
Dont touch me! I snapped, my voice harsher than I meant, eyes burning as I jerked away. It hurts, alright? Just leave me alone!
I felt doubly foolish. Not only did I seem to have broken my armwith an inevitable, mortifying month in a plaster cast ahead, enduring endless jokes from my matesbut Id brought the humiliation on myself. It was my own bright idea to climb the tree, all to impress Emily with my supposed agility, strength, and courage. I could stomach the injury; I could not bear being pitied by Emily after making such a fool of myself. Without meeting her eyes, I staggered up, cradling my limp arm and marched towards the hospital.
Jack, dont be gloomy! she chirped, trotting to keep pace and peppering me with encouragement. Itll all be alright, Jack. Youll see. Everythingll turn out fine!
Oh, just give over! I stopped, fixed her with a cold glare and spat on the pavement. How can it possibly be fine? Cant you see Ive broken my arm? Dont be daft! Just go home, will you? Youre doing my head in!
I trudged away, not looking back, leaving Emily staring after me with her huge, grey-green eyes, repeating in a whisper, Everythingll be alright, Jack itll all be alright.
***
Mr. Jack Whitman, if we dont see a transfer in the next twenty-four hours, youll leave us terribly disappointed. By the way, theyre forecasting black ice across the roads tomorrowso mind how you drive. Accidents happen; no ones immune to a little disaster. Best wishes.
The line went dead. I tossed my phone onto the desk and, gripping my hair, leaned back in my chair.
Where am I meant to get that kind of money? The next payments not due till next month
With a heavy sigh, I snatched up the phone again, punched in the number and put it to my ear.
Mrs. Oliver, is there any chance we can transfer the payment to the consortium for the equipment today?
But Mr. Whitman
Can we do it or not?
Yes, but thatll knock back the rest of the payment schedule
To hell with the schedule! Well sort it out later. Transfer the funds to the consortium immediately.
Yes, but after that well
I hung up before she could finish, slamming my fist into the arm of my chair with a thud.
Bloody leeches
Something soft and sudden brushed my shoulder and I startled, nearly jumping in my seat.
Sophie, how many times have I asked you not to come in while Im working? How many?
My wife, Sophie, pressed her lips to my ear and ran a hand through my hair.
Jack, darling, please dont fret. Itll be alright in the end.
Oh, enough with the endless Itll be alright! Youve said it one too many times, you know? If I end up dead tomorrow, will that still be alright for you?
I leapt up and pushed Sophies hands from mine.
What have you been doing? Cooking stew again? Well, go on and finish it! Just let me be, Im miserable as it is without your fussing.
With a sigh, she turned and headed for the door. Just before leaving, she glanced over her shoulder and repeated, ever softly, those same three words.
***
You know… Im lying here, remembering our whole life
I cracked an eye open to look at her. The years had marked her face with a thousand fine lines, her posture no longer confident and elegant as I remembered. Not letting go of my hand, she gently adjusted the drip in my arm and smiled at me, silently.
Whenever I was in a scrape, whenever I danced with death, whenever I found myself in the thick of it Always you, saying the same thing. You cant imagine how it used to get under my skin, your relentless optimismyour Everythingll be alright. There were times I wanted to strangle you with your own hope. I tried to force a smile, but it dissolved into a coughing fit. When it eased, I carried on: Ive broken more bones than I care to recall, had plenty of folks threaten to do away with me, lost everything more times than Id like to admitand every time, youd just say, Itll all be alright. Odd thing is, you were never wrong. How did you know?
Oh, I didnt know, Jack, she sighed. You think I was saying it for your sake? I was trying to convince myself. Ive loved you like a madwoman all my life, you fool. You are my whole world. Whenever you were in a bad way, my insides twisted up. Ive lost count of the tears Ive cried, the sleepless nights. And through it all, I told myself the same thing: Let the heavens rain stonesas long as hes alive, itll all be alright.
I closed my eyes for a moment and squeezed her hand.
So thats how it was And I used to get angry with you. Forgive me, Sophie. I never knew Imagine that: a whole life together, and I didnt really see you. What an idiot.
Softly, she brushed a tear from her cheek, then leant over me.
Jack, dont fret
She paused, looking deep into my eyes, and rested her head on my unmoving chest, gently stroking my cooling hand.
It was all alright, Jackie. It really was all alright
Reflecting on it now, I finally understandsometimes, the greatest strength is the faith that things truly will be alright, even when every sign points to the contrary.
