Care Staff for His Mother

Diary Entry
Alex, I get it, but I didnt sign up to be your mums personal chef I hissed, dropping a tin of peas into the trolley. Honestly, I just want to chuck everything, hop in the car, and drive home. You promised me a quiet evening, just the three of us. Instead, were cooking for a whole platoon of your relatives, while your mum just sits there! How is this even remotely fair?
Alex tucked his head into his shoulders, avoiding my gaze, suddenly fascinated by the crab sticks. He looked just like a guilty puppy caught in the act.
Katie, keep your voice down, people are staring he mumbled, reaching for my arm. I jerked away. Mum just got carried away, thats all. It happens. Lets just finish the shopping, go back, and knock out the rest of the salads. Please, for me and for the party.
Got carried away. What a charming euphemism.
I could feel my teeth grinding in frustration. Alexs mum absolutely hadnt got carried away shed planned this meticulously.
It all started a week ago with a phone call. Valerie rang to wish us Happy New Year, then suddenly invited us to hers.
My dears, she cooed, sugary enough to give you type two diabetes. Why dont you come round for Christmas? Ive missed you so much! Itll just be the three of us, a proper family catch-up. Im so lonely rattling about in these four walls.
I immediately felt my guard go up. I could sense a trap. Valeries cosy family gatherings always ended the same way with an interrogation about grandchildren.
The first time she brought it up, Alex and I werent even married.
Katie, have you thought about children yet? she asked when we were alone.
I floundered.
Well I began, trying to find the right answer. I do want kids, just not right now. Alex and I are only seeing each other.
Oh, love, the absence of marriage doesnt stop babies, Valerie waved away. But age thats another thing Times ticking, you know, youre not getting any younger. Nor am I I could die before I see grandchildren!
At first, Id just laugh it off, then I started to push back. Eventually, I began avoiding Valerie entirely, just to preserve my sanity.
So, Alexs mum and I barely knew each other and didnt chat much. I was happy to keep it that way, until Alex piped up. Hes too soft, too devoted to his mum, to ever say no.
Just this once, please, he pleaded after another of her calls, looking earnestly at me. Shes getting old. She really is lonely. Just one time, for me. Please.
Alex, youre free to go. You know I dont really do Christmas.
Dont think of it as Christmas just a regular family dinner, he persisted. Mums trying to build bridges with you. We are family
I resisted for ages, but eventually gave in. I figured Id get through with a polite smile and a quick cuppa with cake. I was so naïve
It all went wrong right from the start. Valerie insisted we arrive by eight AM to make the most of it. I was not having it: I wanted a weekend lie-in. It took some serious bargaining, but we managed to delay our arrival till ten.
We crossed the threshold, bleary-eyed and nothing. No smell of meat, no sizzling pans, just Valerie in a greasy dressing gown and curlers.
Finally! she snapped. Its half eleven! Guests are nearly here, and nothings ready. You should have got up earlier! Youll have to help me now.
I froze, not even bothering to hang up my coat.
What guests? I asked, bewildered.
Oh, you know Linda and Victor are passing through from Manchester, couldnt not invite them. Aunt Maureen from downstairs, too. My niece said shed pop in I cant turn people away! Enough chatter, into the kitchen, chop chop, were out of time!
Thats when the scale of the disaster dawned on me. We werent guests we were free labour.
Christmas became total chaos. Valerie transformed from hostess to drill sergeant, brandishing a mop for gravitas, barking orders. She didnt lift a finger to cook. Even worse shed bungled the shopping. Something was missing, other items completely forgotten. She shoved a list at Alex and sent us out to Tesco.
I was ready to run, but held on for Alexs sake.
Back home, we settled into our respective work stations me at the chopping board, Alex elbow-deep in spuds. Not the promised festive cheer just a to-do list. We slaved away for five straight hours in a muggy kitchen.
By four, guests started turning up. Lively, perfumed, and cheerful, while Alex and I were sweaty, dishevelled, and exhausted. We barely managed to stagger to the table, faces red, shirts stained, completely spent Celebrating was the last thing on my mind.
Valerie, by contrast, had changed into a smart dress and even thrown on lipstick. She presided over the table, collecting compliments.
Oh, Valerie, you always go above and beyond! Youre a wonder, all this food! cooed a woman I didnt recognise, helping herself to salad Id chopped.
I do try, all for you, Valerie replied, smiling modestly.
And, of course, she couldnt resist another lecture about the biological clock, raising her glass in an endless toast. If Alex hadnt squeezed my knee, I might have upended the salad bowl right over the table.
This was the last time, I told Alex bluntly on the drive home. Im not setting foot in your mums house again. Go and help her if you want. But Im done.
Alex didnt argue. He just nodded.
Three months passed. My back stopped aching, but I couldnt shake the bitterness. So, when Alex announced in March his mum was inviting us for Mothers Day, I clenched my jaw.
She says this time itll just be the three of us. Maybe Aunt Linda will pop in briefly. But Im not forcing you, he said, wary.
He braced for a row, but I simply looked out the window and then
Fine. Tell your mum well come.
Katie Are you sure?
I am. If I refuse, shell start the guilt calls again, like before. I want to put an end to her inviting us and laying the guilt on thick. Just trust me unless you fancy another slog in her kitchen.
Alex decided not to ask questions, opting for Switzerland.
Mothers Day dawned, but not how Valerie imagined. Alex and I lounged in bed, watching some daft sitcom and eating ice cream under the duvet. No rushing, makeup, or hunting for shirts.
At midday, Valerie started calling.
Hello, Valerie? You wont believe it, weve only just opened our eyes, I said, with faux contrition. We stayed out late with friends, slept through the alarm.
But Im waiting for you! she bristled. Get a move on, the roast is going cold.
Were on our way! An hour, tops we’ll see you then! I promised, then settled back to the TV.
Alex shot me a nervous look, but kept quiet. Better to stay in a warm bed than sweating it out in that kitchen again.
At one, Valerie tried again. This time, I delayed before picking up.
Were almost leaving, Valerie! Just calling a taxi now well dash over, I chirped, still wrapped in blankets.
An hour later, I tweaked the story again.
Theres been a crash on the High Street traffics at a standstill, I told Valerie, muting the TV. Terrible jam. But well get moving soon, Im sure.
By half-four, Valerie lost patience.
Where are you?! she snapped, all the morning sweetness gone. How long does it take?! Youd have walked here ten times by now!
I could hear voices and laughter in the background. I squinted.
Valerie, are you not alone? I asked point-blank.
Alone, not alone, what difference does it make? she snapped back. Some relatives came by. Cant just toss them out. Are you coming or not?! Im on my feet all day, its exhausting!
Ah so once again, she expected us to wait on her guests. Only this time, she was stuck doing it herself.
Actually Were not coming, I said calmly.
What?!
I suddenly feel ill. Must be the motion sickness. We’re heading home.
Silence, then she erupted.
How dare you?! Ungrateful! Ive been slaving in the kitchen all morning whos this all for?! Youre doing it to spite me! If I drop dead with a burst blood vessel Alex, put Alex on!
Alex heard everything, didnt say a word, just looked down. I calmly ended the call and switched my phone off.
There you go, I said to Alex. Another crowd. Clearly, we were meant to serve the guests. Let your mum manage her own circus.
That evening, we went to my parents house.
The difference was obvious as soon as we walked in. There was noise, but a cheerful kind. No sitting about waiting for a servant. Mum struggled to fit a massive salad bowl on the table; Dad sliced sandwiches.
Oh, the youngsters are here! Dad grinned. Alex, grab some chairs from the bedroom theres nowhere to sit.
Alex did, and I helped Mum set out the dishes.
We helped, yes, but not under duress. Here, it felt natural, not some con or exploitation. Everyone did their bit so the whole family could enjoy.
As dinner started, watching Mum smile and Alex chatting away with my dad, I felt myself finally relaxing. Justice had been served. It was tough, yes, and ended with a row, but Valerie will hardly try that trick again. The bridge between me and her has been burnt for good, but better that than being a servant at someone elses partyAs we all raised our glasses, Mum winked at me, and Dad spun a joke about proper family parties that had everyone chuckling, even Alex. The evening slipped by in a warm blurfull stomachs, laughter, and a sense that here, surrounded by my own people, giving wasnt a duty or a test. It was easy. Natural.
Later, after dessert, Alex and I stepped outside into the garden, the sky streaked with orange as the sun slid behind the fence. He squeezed my hand.
Maybe next year, well have everyone here, he said softly, if youre up for it.
I looked at him, and for once, the thought didnt fill me with dread. I knew I could trust my family to keep the madness at bay. As for Valeriewell, everyone knows you cant teach an old dog new tricks. But now Id learned something too: I didnt need to let anyone elses circus disrupt my own sense of home.
I grinned and leaned my head on Alexs shoulder, feeling his warmth. Somewhere in the distance, Mums laughter echoed through the kitchen window. Theres always another dinner, another family gatheringbut this time, wed write our own rules.
And for the first time, the holidays felt truly ours.