Under Mothers Thumb
At thirty-five, Barbara was the very picture of timiditya woman so unassuming, youd think she was auditioning for the role of shrinking violet. Not once had she dated, let alone so much as held hands with a bloke, despite working as an accountant since she finished college. Her life was the definition of uneventful: same job, same spot, same everything.
Fashion wasnt Barbaras strong suit, unless the baggy potato sack look suddenly came into vogue. Plumpish, perpetually glum, lips drooping at the corners as if theyd heard bad news and never recovered. Her mother, Marion, gave birth at eighteenwho Barbaras dad was, no one ever figured out. The poor lass grew up in a quiet English village with her gran, finishing school there before moving to the city to live with her mother when college beckoned.
While Barbara was buffeted by strict discipline in the countryside, Marion might as well have been auditioning for Londons Liveliest. Work hard, party harder: men came and went, fancy frocks, posh shoes, looking like a supermodel with attitude. Once a month (sometimes every other, if she fancied a break from glamour), Marion would descend into the village, drop off a toy, and dash back to the city before Barbara could remember shed visited. Gran was a formidable matriarch, so Barbara never saw much warmth, nor hugs, from anyone.
Even now, Barbara lived in a flat with her mother. Marion, pushing fifty but with the good genes of someone ten years younger, was still a visiontrendy, slender, armed with top-of-the-line beauty creams and a regular spot at the local hair salon. Occasionally, shed breeze off to a date, leaving Barbara to reflect on how different she was.
That day, Barbara finally wrapped up work, handing her files over to a colleague whod cover for her during her holiday.
Well, another holiday begins, Barbara sighed, and so does the inevitable mugging-by-mum. Holiday pays in my purse, but it wont linger. Shell snatch the cash before I can blink, and Ill be stuck spending my holiday at homeagain. Honestly, its wearing me out. Why cant I stand up for myself? Im not a child, but Mother keeps me on a leash, always wants my money, every penny. I cant spend my own wages as I like. Will my life ever change?
She opened the flat door only to discover Marion lurking in the hallway, poised like a cat at a mousehole.
About time! Holiday pay come through? Marion demanded, with all the subtlety of a debt collector.
Yes, I got it, Barbara replied. Just let me take off my coat!
Youll have time to get undressedhand over the dosh.
Barbara fumbled in her battered handbag for her wallet.
Heavens! That dreadful old thingits so tatty, its embarrassing. Arent you ashamed of it? Marion barked.
Barbara looked stunned, eyes brimming with tears.
Id get a new one if I couldbut you take everything I earn, she blurted out, surprised at her own rebellion.
Not just the bag, youre a complete statesloppy, overweight. Pull yourself together! Marion mocked. Honestly, its an embarrassment being seen with you.
Embarrassment? Barbara shot back. Isnt it embarrassing that you take ALL my money? I hardly go anywhere with you anyway! Now she was shouting, spun round and bolted from the flat.
Tears streaked her cheeks as she fled down the stairs, out the door, and collapsed onto a park bench, face in her hands. Time slipped by unnoticed, until
Barbara, love, whats the matter? said Mrs. Anna White from the neighbouring block, settling beside her and clasping Barbaras hand. Crying, are you? Want to tell me whats wrong?
Barbara couldnt hold it in any longer and poured out her story.
Mum takes all my wages, spends a fortune on fancy creams and clothes, while Im in rags. Im pathetic, I knowIve always been soft-hearted, never spoke back to Gran, and now Mums just well, shes harsh and domineering
Anna White listened and nodded, but Barbara grew suddenly embarrassed.
Oh dear, what must you think of me? Gossiping about my own mother failure, thats me all right.
Anna White had known Marion for yonks, never thought much of her, and always felt a bit sorry for Barbara. She knew she was under her mothers thumb.
Enough tears, Barbara! Youre a grown woman now, time to look after yourself.
But whod ever love me, Mrs. White? Im not exactly anyones cup of tea
Nonsense. First thing, you need to move out of your mums. Dont look so scared!
Where would I go? My salarys not much, cant afford a proper let. And Mum would go absolutely ballistic plus, she wants my holiday pay. I just lost it today when she started in on me
Anna White eyed her shrewdly. So youve got your holiday pay, and your mum didnt snatch it yet? Let her sort herself outshe wont starve. You focus on YOU. Listen, Ive got a little place out in the countrythe cottage my late husband built with his own two hands. Why not spend your holiday there? No rent.
Oh Mrs. White, are you sure? Isnt it risky letting me stay in your house?
Dont be daft, Barbara, Ive known you a long time. Sit tightIll fetch you the keys, jot down directions and my number.
Barbara made her way to the station, bought a ticket for the train (thank goodness for British Rail) and sat with her nose pressed to the window, people-watching on the platform. Shed never been out of town, never gone anywhere except work and home, no one ever paid her much attention. As the train rattled along, she gazed out at the passing countryside. Upon arrival, Barbara walked briskly to the cottage, unlocked the door, and stepped inside.
A hush enveloped her; she sank into the ancient armchair, marvelling at the quiet.
Wow absolute silence. Bliss! Is this what freedom feels like? she wondered.
No mother breathing down her neck, no snide remarks. Finding the TV remote on the table, she flicked it ona talk show. Usually, Marion would commandeer the set, switching to her own silly shows, not caring what Barbara wanted.
Youre as odd as your taste in telly, Marion would sneer, then hurl insults for good measure.
Barbara had never dared talk back, shrinking into herself more with every rant. Confronting her mum was foreign territory.
She had a poke around the kitchen, plugged in the fridge, and loaded it with cheese, yoghurt, and ready-made pork pie shed been clever enough to buy at the station shop en route.
After a hearty supper, Barbara relaxed.
Oh, its glorious being alone, she sighed.
The phone rangit was her mum.
So, youve gone walkabouts? Saw you jawing with Mrs. White on the bench. Go on thentry living on your own, see how you cope! You wont last a week. Youre hopeless without meyoull come running back, mark my words!
Barbara hung up before Marion could finish her tirade. Oddly, she didnt feel upset at all. That evening Anna White called.
Barbara, how are you settling in? Had a good nose around?
Yes, thank you, Mrs. White.
My nephew Stephen will pop round tomorrow with your thingsyour mum dropped off a bin bag full at mine earlier and told me, If youve taken my daughter, you might as well take her stuff too!
Thanks, Mrs. White. And how do I recognise Stephen?
Big chap, glasses, drives a blue hatchback. Honestly, stop fretting and start your independent life. Most importantly, learn to love yourself. Maybe treat yourself to a new outfityoure quite lovely underneath it all, just need a bit of care. Chin up, dear.
Early morning dew glistened on the grass, a dog barked somewhere distant, birds were singing
Barbara mulled over Annas words and peered at herself in the mirror.
So Ive let myself go Take away the messy bun and the droopy face, and my eyes arent half bad, just a bit sad. Hairs thick as anythingwhy do I scrape it back like an old granny? Maybe Mum was rightI should slim down a bit.
She slept like a rock that night, not waking once. Bright sunshine peeked through the curtains as she awoke. Opening the window, she breathed in country airdewdrops dancing on the grass, birds warbling, a dog barking in the distance.
Smashing, what a gorgeous morning, she said, stretching.
Soon she was out on the porch, sipping a mug of coffee unearthed from the kitchen cupboard, catching up with daytime telly. Shed started wonderingmaybe she should change jobs, rent a flat somewhere more convenient? Living at the cottage was lovely, but the commute would be a nightmare. She barely thought of Marion. Her heart fluttered at the prospect of something new.
Ill finally live for myselfno more dancing to mums tune. Her daydream was interrupted by a gentle knock at the door.
Who could that be? she wondered, cautiously answering.
Stephen stood on the steptall, bespectacled, with a hefty bag in tow.
Morning! he grinned, Im Stephenare you Barbara?
Yes, lovely to meet you. Do come in.
Auntie Anna asked me to bring your things, lend you a hand. Need to pop anywhere? My cars parked just outside, Stephen offered with a warm smile. Dont be shy, Barbarashes told me youre a bit on the reserved side. I know the basics sorry, I mean, I know your story from Auntie Anna.
And that was how Barbara met her future husband. Stephen quickly grew fond of herhis first marriage had been a disaster, so he saw Barbara with fresh eyes. With love blossoming, Barbara transformed; her nervous shuffle was replaced by confidence, her haunted look gone. She slimmed down, started caring about her appearancebooked into a beauty salon and left looking absolutely radiant.
Is that really me? she smiled at her reflection, sparkling-eyed.
Stephen whisked her off to his flat in town.
Barbara, Ive always wanted someone like youkind, genuine, caring. Lets not waste timewere not young anymore Will you marry me?
Barbara, sensibly, said yesshe knew shed struck gold with Stephen. They suited each other perfectly. The wedding was simple and tender, with Marion invited (who, true to form, started with her barbed comments right at the reception). Anna White put her in her place so sharply that Marion left early, no one much noticed, and Barbara didnt shed a tear.
Stephens family adored Barbara. He watched her with love and thought,
Happiness comes to everyone eventuallyand now its arrived for me and Barbara.
Soon enough, Barbara was expecting, doubling her joy. Late happiness, perhaps, but what a blessing. The years of living under her mothers grip faded away; shed bravely changed her life for good, blossoming both inside and out.
Self-love at last, and love for Stephen, too.
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