My mum thinks Katies the weak one, my wifes words finally slipped out. She says Katie needs more help because she doesnt have a husband. But were apparently all settled.
All settled? I turned, frowning. Alex, since I gave birth Ive put on over two stone. My backs shot, my knees crack every time I pick up little Jamie. The doctor says I need to start going to the gym or, next year, I wont even be able to lift him. That means I need to get outan hour and a half, twice a week at least. Youre always at work, shifts all over the place. Whos supposed to watch Jamie then? She glared at me. Your mother doesnt careshes already got a granddaughter!
I stayed silent. She was rightwho?
Alex pressed her forehead against the cool kitchen window and watched as my mums battered old Vauxhall slowly reversed out the driveway.
The red brake lights flashed one last time and disappeared around the corner.
It was exactly 7pm, according to the kitchen clock.
Mum had managed to stick around for forty-five minutes.
In the lounge, I was sitting on the floor, trying to keep our year-old son entertained.
Jamie was fascinated with spinning the wheel of his plastic dumper truck, but kept glancing towards the door where his gran had just disappeared.
Shes gone, then? I popped my head into the kitchen, rubbing a crick in my neck.
Flown off, Alex corrected me without looking back. Said Jamie was getting cranky from tiredness and she didnt want to ruin his routine.
Its true, he did whimper a bit when she picked him up, I tried to smile, but it came out wonky.
He whimpered because he barely knows her! We havent seen her for three weeks. Three!
Alex turned abruptly from the window and began loading dirty mugs into the sink.
Oh, dont, Alex, I said, coming up behind her and half-heartedly attempting a hug, but she dodged me with an easy twist as she reached for the sponge. Mums just shes used to Chloe. Chloes olderfour. Easier to look after.
Its not easier, Jack. Its just more interesting for your mum. Alexs eyes narrowed. Chloes Katies daughter. Katie is your mums golden girl. Us? Were just here. A couple of spare parts.
The previous Friday had played out almost identically.
Mum had popped in just for a minute, brought Jamie some cheap plastic rattle, and immediately started looking at the clock.
Id barely managed to say I was working on Saturday and it would be a real help if Mum could watch Jamie for a couple of hours while Alex popped to Boots and Tesco.
Oh Jack, no can do! Mum clapped her hands together in horror. Were off to the puppet theatre with Chloe and then Katie wants her for the weekend. The poor girls worn out from workneeds to get a social life going.
My sister Katie raised Chloe on her own, though that was a stretch. While Katie worked on herself and changed boyfriends, Chloe lived with Grandma for weeks. Mum picked her up from nursery, took her to tap-dancing, bought her overpriced coats, and could name every doll on Chloes shelves.
Did you see her Facebook? Alex nodded at my phone on the table. Look what your mum posted.
I reluctantly picked up the mobile and scrolled.
There was Chloe eating an ice cream, Mum pushing her on the swings, the two of them sculpting something out of Play-Doh on a Saturday night.
The caption: My greatest joy, my little treasure.
She spent the whole weekend there, Alex bit her lip to stop herself crying. We got a ten-minute drive-by! Over there, its paradise.
Jack, Jamies just a year old. Hes her grandson. YOUR son. What does she have against him?
I was silentI had no answer.
I remembered only too well Mum calling me in the middle of the night last monthher kitchen tap exploded, flooding everywhere. Id dropped everything and shot halfway across town to fix it. The payday loan Id paid off for hershed used it to buy Katie a new iPhone for her birthday. Digging the garden every May while Katie and Chloe lounged on deckchairs.
Well ask her again, I suggested quietly. Ill explainthis is about Alexs health. Not a whim.
Alex said nothing. She knew too well what the answer would be.
***
We had the conversation on Tuesday night.
I put the phone on speaker so Alex could hear.
Mum, hi Listen, thing is, Alex needs the gym for medical reasons. Her backs really gone
Oh Jack, a gym? Mums voice boomed brightly. Chloes laugh could be heard in the background. Tell her to do star jumps at home! Eat fewer custard creams and her backll be fine.
Its not a debate, Mum. The doctor says she MUST have proper sessions and massages. Can you watch Jamie six to eight, Tuesday and Thursday? Ill collect you and drive you home.
Silence.
Jack, you know my week. I pick up Chloe at five. Then its clubs, then the park. Katie works lateshe depends on me. I cant leave Chloe just so Alex can go leaping about on a treadmill!
Mum, Jamie is your grandson too. He needs you. You see him once a month!
Oh, dont start. Chloes a little girl, she wants a nan, she loves me. Jamies still tiny, he doesnt know any better. When he grows up, Ill get close. Right now were busy with painting. Gotta run, bye.
I put the phone down slowly.
You heard that? Alexs voice shook. Jamies got to earn her attention now? Reach some milestone for his gran to deign to care?
I I didnt know shed say that.
I did! Alexs voice was taut with tears. I knew it the day she missed our hospital discharge because Chloe desperately needed new tights! Jack, I dont care if she thinks Im fat or lazy. Im angry for Jamie. Hell grow up and ask, Mum, why is Grandma Linda always with Chloe, never with me? What should I say? That his aunt Katies the favourite, and his dads only good for fixing things and picking up the bills?
I stood and started pacing the kitchen, back and forth for ten minutes, before stopping dead.
That kitchen reno we talked about for Mumremember?
Alex nodded.
Wed been quietly saving for half a year, planning to redo Mums kitchen for her sixtieth. Id picked units, found a builder, negotiated a discount. The money wouldve paid for the years best gym membership, with a trainer and pool access, for Alex.
No more reno, I said firmly. Ill ring the showroom tomorrow and cancel.
You mean it? Alexs eyes were wide.
Absolutely. If my mum only has time for one grandchild, she can deal with her own problems. Let Katies new barman fix the leaky kitchen, haul potatoes from the allotment, and bail her out. Well hire you a nanny for your gym time.
***
Next morning Mum rang herself.
Jack, love, youre still coming this week to check my extractor fan? Its smoking up the kitchen. Chloe misses youshe keeps saying, Wheres Uncle Jack?
I was in the office. Once, Id have been flapping about getting off work, popping to B&Q on the way.
But now
Im not coming, Mum.
What do you mean? Instantly, her voice was wounded. What about the fan? Ill suffocate!
Ask Katie. Or her latest boyfriend. Im busyAlexs health comes first now. Im on Jamie-duty.
Over something like this? She scoffed. Youd ditch your own mother just for your wifes fads?
Im not ditching anyone. Im just setting my priorities, the same way you do. You choose Katie and Chloe; I choose Alex and Jamie. Thats only fair, isnt it?
You cheeky sod! she shouted. I raised you! I gave you everything!
What, Mum? I replied. Helping Katie out with my money? Letting her put her feet up while I did your gardening? By the waythe kitchen units for your birthday? Ive cancelled. That moneys for our family now. We need a nanny, since Jamies nans too busy for him.
She immediately erupted. How dare you! Im your mother! I gave my life for you and you treat me like this! Chloes practically an orphanshe needs love. Jamie has everythingwhy should I have to love him? My heart belongs to Chloe; shes my angel! Dont you dare ring me, or set foot here again!
I ended the call, hands tremblingbut somehow, I felt lighter. I knew this was just the beginning. Mum would ring Katie, and soon Id get a barrage of texts about being heartless and stingy.
And sure enough, that evening, Alex met me at the doorshed already had a five-minute long voicemail from my mother, calling her a snake in the grass.
Are you sure this is right? she whispered as we put Jamie to bed and sat down to dinner. Shes still your mum.
A real mother loves all her children and grandchildren, I said. Not just her favourites, not just the ones that are useful. I let this go on too long. When she said she didnt care about your healthor Jamiebecause shes too busy with Chloe No. Enough.
**
The fall-out went on for ages.
Both Katie and Mum, short of their usual handouts, bombarded usinsults, pleas, threats, guilt-trips. We ignored the calls, the texts.
Two weeks later, Katie turned up at our front door.
She started shouting straight away, called me a doormat and ungrateful, and demanded I immediately pay Mums bills and hand over cash for food and prescriptions.
I just shut the door in her face.
Id done my time being the dutiful son. I wasnt interested anymore.
