Hannah, please, take her! I just cant any longer! I can hardly bring myself to touch her, it makes my skin crawl!
Lizzie was shaking, baby in her arms screaming her little lungs out. Hannah gently reached over, took the bundle from her sister and nodded, quietly.
Alright. But this is what you want? You wont come back later with complaints?
No, no complaints! Just take her, Hannah, I dont want her!
The little girl was barely a month old. From the very start of Lizzies pregnancy, things had been off. Hannah had put the mood swings down to late pregnancy hormones; after all, her sister had been widowed more than seven years now, and the older kids were grown and out the house. That seaside tripa flash romance and the surprise pregnancyshocked everyone. Lizzie had never been the spontaneous type.
At first, it almost seemed like Lizzie was actually happy about the baby. Sometimes shed go on sprees buying tiny outfits and hunting for prams, but then shed disappear into herself for weeks, as if hiding behind a brick wall.
Right before the birth, Lizzie cut everyone off. No calls to Mum, or Hannah, or her own children. Hannah panicked and tracked her down to the maternity ward, just as Lizzie was filling out papers to give the baby up.
Lizzie, whats happened? Why, love?
I dont know. I dont feel a thing. Shes not mine.
What do you mean? Of course shes yours! Shes your child!
She wont be mine. Lizzie turned her face to the wall.
Emergency measures: Hannah fetched Mum. Between the two of them, they persuaded Lizzie to at least bring the baby home. Mum insisted Lizzie come to stay with her for a bit, to help her outbut really, they were just keeping an eye on her. Lizzie did everything by the book, but never spent more than a second longer than necessary near the girl. Gran chose the name, and it was Hannah who carried her around.
Lizzie, I should take her, Hannah said at last. Ill raise her. But you realise in time, shell start to call me Mum?
I dont care, Hannah. As long as shes not calling me that.
A week later, all the paperwork was sorted. Hannah was officially Florences legal guardian. Lizzie packed up and moved to another city.
Flo grew up into a proper handful, always laughing and getting into mischief. She took her first steps early, chatting as soon as she could, and always called Hannah Mum.
Twelve years sped by.
Mum! Three top marks today! And tomorrow the whole class is going to the cinema, Flos voice rang through the flat.
Is that her?
Yeah, Lizzie. Im asking you
Hello! Im Flo, who are you?
There she was: Flo, tall and wide-eyed, stood in the kitchen doorway, glancing curiously between the woman sat at the table and her white-as-a-sheet Mum standing at the window.
Im Lizzie. Im your mother, Flo.
I asked you Hannah burst, before stepping over to Flo. Flo, sweetheart, let me explain
No need, Mum. Lets hear her first. So youre my mother. And?
Ive come to take you with me. I want you to live with me.
Why?
Because youre my daughter.
No, Im not. Ive got a motherstanding right here. And I dont need another. This is the firstand, I hope, last time Ill ever see you. Flo spun around and strode out of the kitchen.
Hannah slumped onto a chair, exhausted.
So, what did you get out of all of this?
Not yet, but I will. You just wait. Ill even go through the courts if I have to, Lizzies voice was cold.
Why, Lizzie? You were the one who walked awaynone of us could understand. And now, after all these years, you expect her to leap into your arms? Sorry, but maybe you should just go see Mum for nowwell talk later. I need to check on my daughter.
My niece! Lizzie declared, standing up sharply.
Hannah just sighed, closed the door quietly, and went to Flos room.
Flossie
Mum, wait. Before you say anything, let me just tell youI already know. Remember a year ago, when we were clearing out at Grandmas? I found the guardianship papers. I was furious you hadnt told me, then I thought about meeting her to ask why. But, honestly, I realised theres no point. You are my Mum. I dont need anyone else!
Oh, Flo, my darling! I wouldnt give you up for the world.
Well, Im not giving myself up either! Flo giggled. Remember my classmate, Jack? His mums a solicitorand she does family law.
Honestly! Look at you, sorting everything out. Just remember Im still the grown-up in this house, okay? Hannah chuckled, pulling her into a big hug. But yes, well call her, and well sort it out.
The following weeks were a whirlwind of nerves and legal drama, but in the end, the court left things as they were. Flo made it very clear she wouldnt live with her birth mother or accept her.
After the hearing, the sisters paused outside the courthouse.
Well, thats that, thank goodness, Hannah exhaled with relief. What are you going to do now?
Im leaving, Han. I wont make things difficult. Ill support Flodont say no, please. Ive already started a savings account for her, documents are with Mum.
Why all of this, Lizzie? Why did you leave her in the first place?
There was never any holiday fling, Han. There was no romance, nothing at all. There was a dark park, a late evening
Hannahs breath caught in her throat.
And you never said anything? All these years, you carried that?
There was nothing that could be done. So I kept quiet. I genuinely didnt even realise I was pregnant at firstthought it was the menopause, and then it was too late. Dont tell Flo. She doesnt need to know. This is my past, not hers. Maybe one day, shell forgive me.
Hannah hugged her sister tightly and together they watched Flo chatting with their mum.
Sometimes, the worst thing can turn into something beautiful, dont you think? Shes so lovely, Lizzie dabbed her eyes, and for the first time in years, Hannah saw her sister smile.
