My daughter-in-law fell out with me over the flat, and now shes started turning my son against me.
My son, Mark, has become involved with a rather unscrupulous woman who manipulates him whenever she pleases. Lately, shes been doing her best to drive a wedge between the two of us. She claims that I dont care about their happiness and that Im only thinking about myself. She reached this conclusion after I refused to swap flats with them.
My husband passed away a few years ago, and Mark is my only child. I raised him with all the love and care I had, gave him a good education, and made sure he never wanted for anything. Before he got married, he lived with us at home. He started working during university, and as soon as he graduated he managed to land a decent job.
Mark has always been my pride and joy. Hes a wonderful lad and hes getting on well in his career. My husband and I always lived modestly and we simply didnt have the means to buy our son his own place. In fact, we only managed to buy a flat for ourselves when we were in our forties. Before that, we rented. We certainly couldnt stretch to a second property for Mark. But, after all, he can earn his own way, just as we did.
When Mark first told me he was seeing someone, I was delighted. I tried my utmost to have a good relationship with my daughter-in-law: never lectured or scolded her. It didnt matter to me who Mark brought home what mattered was that he was happy. At first, I warmed to Emily she was polite and unassuming. But it was only after the wedding that her true colours started to show.
After they married, Mark and Emily went on their honeymoon, and when they returned, Emily promptly handed in her notice at work. She said her bosses were always picking on her, and that she wanted to find a better job. But thats as far as it went. For two years now, shes been unemployed, living off my son, and has shown absolutely no sign of wanting to get a job.
Mark and Emily have been living in her one-bedroom flat on the outskirts of Manchester. Since Emily stays at home all day, Mark cant afford to buy a new place; Emily blows all their money on beauty salons and clothes. I simply cant understand how she hasnt managed to find a job in two years. I rather suspect shes not even going to interviews she probably much prefers sponging off her husband while enjoying a comfortable life.
One day I asked her if theyd thought about having a child.
How can you expect us to raise a child in such a cramped flat? she replied.
Perhaps you could save for a deposit on a mortgage, I suggested.
Theres no money left to save we barely scrape by as it is, Emily answered.
I bit my tongue rather than point out that if she got a job, or they put their minds to saving, they could have put some aside by now. If Id seen them making a proper effort to save for their own place, I would have helped Ive already squirrelled away a tidy sum. But I wont just give them money, knowing Emily will fritter it away on nonsense.
Lately, my daughter-in-law has started talking about having a baby, complaining that time is ticking on and that I ought to think about grandchildren. But how could they possibly raise a child in their situation? Now Marks started siding with Emily.
Mum, you know, Emily and I were thinking why dont we just swap flats? No need for any legal fuss, just a straight swap. Then we wouldnt have to worry about mortgages, and your place would be more than enough for you.
Hearing my son say this honestly hurt me. Theres no way hed have come up with the idea himself. I told him Id be too far from work if I moved, and, as the saying goes, you cant teach an old dog new tricks.
Youve only got a few years left at work. Once you retire, youll have grandchildren to visit, Emily added with a sweet smile.
I refused their generous offer Ive no intention of being forced out of my home.
Since then, Mark has brought it up a few more times, and his comments have stung even more. Hes never been the type to take advantage of others, but its clear his wifes putting him up to it.
Come on, lets go home, Emily said on their last visit, loud enough for me to hear. Didnt I tell you? Your mum doesnt care whether we have a family. She wouldnt lift a finger to help us!
After that visit, Mark stopped calling. He doesnt answer the phone, or call me back. I cant understand why hes acting like this. Hes not a fool, but whenever his wifes around, I swear he loses all sense.
