The Trailer

TRAILER
Im honestly exhausted by parties, by fleeting romances, by endless dates that never lead anywhere.
So when I met simple, cheerful, clever Emily, I realised straight awaythis could be it.
We grabbed coffee at a little place near Charing Cross, listened to some buskers by the Thames, chatted about my work milestones and her passion for modern poetry, and when we both confessed we prefer potato salad with apples, it felt like the stars were actually aligning for a change.
The scene for this unexpected leap forward in my love life was set: Emilys flat, where she invited me for dinner.
I put on my best shirt, had a decent shave, even tried to memorise a few oddball lines from one of her favourite poets, bought flowers and a decent bottle of wine.
I was walking over positively buoyant, self-assured as only a smug tomcat that strolls to its bowl every hour can be.
The evening hadnt even started and already everything was mapped out in my head, with the sort of confidence that only comes from utter predictabilityexcept, of course, for the moment the door opened and I heard: Evening.
Im Stephen.
Mums in the shower, come in.
I froze.
There, filling the doorway, was a boy on the verge of manhood, with a square face and hands big enough to smother my entire head in one go.
For a fleeting second I thought Id got the wrong flat, but then Stephen let out a huge sneezemouth firmly closed, nose pinched between two fingersspookily reminiscent of the way Emily sneezes, and all doubt evaporated.
My optimism plummeted, the wine felt suspiciously vinegary, and the bouquet seemed to wilt before my very eyes.
Once inside, I spotted Stephens trainersgood heavens.
They were large enough that I couldve put them on over my own brogues and still needed some growing to fill them out.
Emily herself barely reached her sons chest.
I couldnt help but wish womens jewellery worked like this: give her a ring now and, ten years on, youd find a wedding band in your palmsome return on the investment, at least.
I followed Emilys voice into the kitchen, my mind still whirring.
Five minutes and Ill be out! she called from the bathroom.
It took more like twenty-five.
When the door did finally swing open, Emily emerged glowing, fully made up, wearing an elegant dress, but she caught the look on my face instantlythe whole atmosphere curdled, romance evaporating with her perfume.
Wordlessly, she plated up dinner, poured me some winedidnt wait for a toast, just started eating.
Why didnt you mention you had a child? I blurted, stung by the omission.
Scared off by the baggage? Emily replied with a tired smirk.
Thats not a bit of excess luggage, thats a full-on freight train.
Big lad, isnt he?
Takes after his dadgrew up in some remote Scottish village, even taller than Stephen.
Supposedly fought off a wild boar with his bare hands.
And wheres Mr.
Boar-Wrestler now? I swallowed hard.
Touring.
With the animal itself, no less.
He left us for the bright lights.
Sometimes he writes.
To be honest, when I see his handwriting, Im convinced its the boar thats taken overdefinitely exhibits more decency.
How old is he? I nodded at the wall, meaning Stephen.
Fourteen.
Only just collected his passport.
Did he mug someone for it?
Ha ha, very funny.
After that we ate in silence.
Nothing seemed to bridge the awkwardness.
Could I have some more of that roast? I asked, holding out my plate.
You like it?
Honestly, its the best Ive ever had.
What is it?
Elk.
Stephen cooks the meat.
No wayhes got a knack then.
Inherited from his dad: along with a battered old cookbook, knives, rods, an inflatable dinghy, and some random odds and ends he offloaded on us.
A boat? I asked, suddenly interested.
Yep, down in the basement.
Well, its *meant* to be stored there.
Stephens mad for fishing.
Just then, Emilys phone buzzed.
Apologising, she slipped out to take the call.
Time I headed home, I thought to myself.
There was really nothing left for me here.
Colin, can I ask something? Emily returned to the kitchen, sudden urgency in her voice.
Theres a crisis at workcould you stay with Stephen for a couple of hours?
Me?
With Stephen?
Why?
Hes fourteen, still underageyou never know what can happen, and these days people are dodgy
You reckon someones going to abduct *him* unnoticed?
Fine, she changed tone, Ill pay you for the lost evening and for the babysitting, and I wont ever call again, deal?
And what do I do with him?
Youre both blokes, arent you?
Talk about bloke stuff.
Ive really got to go.
Emily didnt wait for an answer; she was out the door in a flash.
I killed time in the kitchen until my phone died, finished off the wine (and the roast), but Emily wasnt coming back.
Finally, I wandered to Stephens door and heard familiar sounds inside.
It cant be, I thought, and knocked.
Its open.
I gently pushed the door and entered.
The first thing I saw was a large wooden target on the wall, bristling with knives and dartsno holes in the wall, mind you.
The kid always hit the mark.
On the desk, a record player spun, a quiet Iron Maiden track filling the room.
Stephen fiddled with a tangle of fishing line in the corner.
The room screamed boys fortress: trophies on top of the wardrobe, a punch bag hanging from the ceiling, a brand new Xbox by the telly.
Crikey, your mum spoils you rotten, I whistled, slightly jealous.
Id always dreamt of a room like this.
I work during the summer, Stephen replied, and I suddenly felt embarrassed for assuming he was just a bottomless pit of demands, when in fact, he was more self-sufficient than Id ever been.
Got a phone charger by any chance? I asked, holding up my dead mobile.
Next to the railway set, Stephen indicated.
Railway set? I nearly spluttered, and when I turned I saw ita sprawling model railway complex.
I literally forgot to breathe.
Built it yourself? I whispered, spellbound.
Yeah.
Picking up extra pieces here and there.
Planning a second tier and a couple of bridges.
New tracks arrived last week but havent had a chance to set them up yet.
I felt a flush of warmthhead and heart.
Mind if we give it a spin?
Sure.
Gimme a sec. He abandoned his fishing lures and, with a single stride, crossed the room.
***
Emily was away an hour.
She was so certain Id have legged it that she quietly peeked into Stephens room firstthere she found the two of us, heads together, testing out the trains.
For a moment, youd be hard-pressed to guess which one of us was fourteen.
Colin, its time you went home, she said gently.
Ohsorry!
What time is it?
Half ten, she yawned, looking shattered.
Ive got to be up early for that crisis at work, so I really need sleep.
She saw me to the door, gave me a kiss on the cheek, and handed me some notes.
I dont take money from women, I muttered, turning up my nose.
Fair enough.
Thanks for looking after my trailer.
I flashed a small smile and left.
***
A couple of days later, I rang.
Id like to pop by again, if thats all right.
She sounded distracted.
Colin, Im up to my eyes at worknot really up for any relationship stuff, and after last time
Could I call in to see Stephen, then?
Stephen? she echoed, puzzled.
Yeah.
Maybe you need someone to keep an eye on him again?
Um…
Im not sure.
Ill have to ask him.
Ive already messaged himhes game.
Brought a new game for his Xbox and all.
Well keep quiet, you focus on whatever you need to.
Well all right, come over this evening.
That time, I showed up with no shirt or aftershave, no wine or silly glancesjust a black Iron Maiden t-shirt, a rucksack full of crisps and fizzy pop, and a sheepish, boyish grin.
Just keep it down, Emily instructed, meeting me at the door in her dressing gown, a face mask on and her breath smelling of onions.
Got a video call in a bit.
I nodded and headed for the boys room.
That evening, Emily practically had to separate usStephen and me were deep in debate about the merits of Guy Ritchies films versus Ken Loach, nearly launching an all-night film marathon.
She managed to drag me away eventually.
Dont forget the groundbait on Saturday! Stephen shouted after me.
Groundbait? Emily arched an eyebrow.
Were going after pike.
I told Stephen I know a shop with the best bait in London.
Honestly, I havent been fishing in ages.
Cant wait.
You two are proper mates, arent you?
Dont want to spend any time with me then?
You could always come alongmake us some sandwiches.
Yeah, sure.
Like Ive got nothing better to do.
Just go on your fishing trip. She smiled, shooing me out the door.
At least hes putting his energy into something.
***
A month flashed by.
Emily was totally buried at work, couldnt even stumble in the general direction of romance.
Meanwhile, Stephen and I thrived: we finished the railway, caught some crayfish, brewed old fashioned ginger beer from a recipe in Stephens inherited cookbook.
He taught me to use a compass in the woods; I taught him the basics of flirting and how to ask out the girl from the next form.
All was calm and tidy, until one evening someone banged on the door so hard the ceiling lights nearly shook loose.
Emily opened the doorand a blast of wild animal stench hit us.
Her ex stood in the hallway, towering and broad-shouldered.
Ive changed, he intoned, dropping to one kneestill a good head taller than Emily.
Potap the boar and I want a quiet life.
Saved up some money, Ill take you and Stephen back to the Highlands.
Youll give up work.
Stephen and Ill fish and hunt.
Well be a real family.
Oh please.
Ten years gone, and now your animals retired, you want back in the fold?
Its not that!
He signed a film contract behind my back he grumbled.
Ah, so thats it.
Booted out by your own beast, Emily crossed her arms.
In that moment, I emerged from Stephens room in Emilys shirt.
Em, I borrowed your topI got mine messy painting the engine with Stephen
Does *anyone* in this flat ever finish a sentence? Emily muttered, flicking her eyes between us.
Whos this? the ex demanded, raising a fist the size of my head.
Umm this is Emily stammered, not knowing how to explain.
Then Stephen barreled out and, with surprising ease, pinned his fathers arm behind his back, pressing him to the wall.
Hes the trailer! Stephen hissed.
Stephen!
Its me, Dad!
What trailer? his father gasped in pain.
The sort of trailer that helps Mum and me carry all the baggage you left us, Stephen shot back.
But I didnt leave you anything! the ex protestedthen seemed to catch his own meaning.
Emily and I retreated into the corner as the titans clashed.
All right, all right, break it up, her ex yelped, and Stephen released him at last.
Well, lad, youve got some strengthtakes after me.
Ready for boar-hunting.
Thats what Im suggesting anyway.
Could I take him out tomorrow?
Talk about old times, maybe rebuild something?
I am his father, after all. His eyes pleaded.
Emily was torn, glancing between us.
Yes, I get it. I nodded and made for the door.
Im sorry
***
Next morning, Stephen and his father left at dawn.
Stephen returned late that night, alone.
Wheres your dad? Emily demanded.
He left, Stephen replied, kicking off his shoes.
How do you meanjust up and left?
Not exactly. Stephen shook his head.
Left with the boar.
Packed it in the trailer, drove off for more touring.
Dropped me in town and that was it.
Oh for goodness sake, Im an idiot, Emily groaned, clutching her forehead.
I should ring Colin, she muttered, reaching for her phone.
No needI just said goodbye to him.
He gave me a lift home.
Promised to come by tomorrow.
But you left your phone here!
How did he know where to collect you?
He said he followed us.
Wanted to make sure I got back safe, and you too.
Did he really say that?
Yeah.
And he also said hes hitched to us now and probably never going to unhitch.