We had really hoped that my mum would retire, move out to the countryside, and let me and my husband have her three-bedroom flat!
I’d like to tell you about my neighbour, Margaret. She’s 68 now, living alone in her own spacious three-bedroom flat. Not long ago, Margaret decided to let it out and go away on holiday.
Her daughter Hannah came round to see me and started complaining about her:
What is my mum playing at? Shes let me down terribly! Now my mother-in-law is going on at me saying that Ill go round the bend in my old age, just like Mum. Says the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. And my husband and I have only just taken out a loan for a new car! Weve missed two payments already. We were counting so much on Mum helping us out! But instead, shes rented out her flat and jetted off on holiday!
I looked at Hannah in disbelief why should her mum be expected to pay off the loan for their car? But Hannah went on:
My mother-in-laws furious that were living in her flat, while my mum let hers out!
I realised Hannah wanted me to sympathise. But in my view, Margarets done the right thing. She deserves to live her life the way she wants. Why is it that whenever a woman retires, people think she should dedicate herself entirely to her children and grandchildren? I dont think its fair! So I asked Hannah:
Why dont you and your husband rely on yourselves? Why not put your efforts into making your own way? Why didnt you spend the last 15 years of marriage saving up for your own place? Then your mother-in-law wouldnt have anything to hold against you.
Hannah replied:
We just really hoped that when Mum retired, shed move to the country and wed be given her three-bedroom flat!
I decided to make light of the situation and teased her:
What if Margaret decided to get married herself? She had a friend who went on holiday to Spain, met a man, got married, and now lives happily ever after there. Maybe Margaret will do the same.
At this, Hannah stared at me, speechless. Recently, I saw photos of Margaret online she looks relaxed and is clearly enjoying life. I’m happy for her. I think shes absolutely done the right thing. After all, age shouldnt be a barrier to being happy or to discovering new joys in life.
