You’re Taking Advantage of Grandma—She Looks After Your Child but Won’t Even Watch Mine on Weekends Sometimes in life, we have to come up with quick solutions to sudden problems. That’s exactly what happened to Laura. My son is four years old now and for me, he’s amazing. I can’t say he always behaves, but I’ve never met a perfectly behaved child—kids are natural mischief-makers. I’m expecting my second child too, and this is where things get complicated. At my next check-up with the midwife, I was referred to hospital. There was something to be concerned about and I couldn’t delay. The obvious question was: who would look after my son? My husband was away on a business trip for another ten days, and my parents were working full-time. None of my other relatives were available. My grandmother volunteered to help, saying she would watch my son until I was discharged from hospital. I wasn’t sure she’d cope since she’s seventy, and my son is so quick on his feet, but needs must… A decision was made. My parents offered to take over in the evenings after work, and my grandmother would take care of my son during the day. That was our plan. But I was still nervous—it’s my son, after all, and there were no better options. I phoned my grandmother constantly to check in, and to my surprise, she and my son seemed to get along beautifully. The week flew by and, once I returned, my husband took the reins. Soon I was ready to be discharged. On the weekend, my sister rang, furious with me. Her daughter is only two, and whenever she tried to persuade our grandmother to help on weekends, she refused—she said my niece was still too young. My sister practically begged, but grandma didn’t want to! “You just took advantage of grandma!” she accused. But I replied: “I was desperate! I couldn’t take my son with me into hospital. I asked you to help, but you refused. Now you want grandma to look after your daughter just so you can have a break? There’s a big difference between a two-year-old and a four-year-old! Besides, is it really fair to leave such a young child with an elderly grandparent? Take her to your in-laws.” “They won’t look after her. And I’m stuck with her all day, every day!” I think my sister is in the wrong here. There really is a big difference between a two-year-old and a four-year-old. If given the choice, I wouldn’t have sent my son to stay with relatives either. But my sister still argues that I exploited our grandmother.

You take advantage of Gran. She looks after your child but wont even have mine at the weekends.

Sometimes, in life, you find yourself needing a quick fix for a sudden problem. Thats exactly what happened to Charlotte.

My son is four now. Im utterly convinced hes perfect for me. I cant claim hes always well-behaved, but do you know any children who always are? Theyre all a bit of a handful. I’ve another little one on the way, which is what all this is about.

I went for my next appointment with the midwife, and they sent me straight to hospital. There was something to worry about and no time to spare. The foremost question was: who would look after my boy?

My husband was away in Manchester, stuck on a business trip. He wouldnt be home for another ten days. My parents, both at work in the city, couldnt help. No other relatives were available. Gran decided to step in. She said shed have my son until I was discharged. Shes seventya grand old ageand hes as quick as a weasel. Who knows how that would go

That was the final word. My parents work privately and said theyd pop over to stay with their grandson after work. By day, Gran would take charge. Thats what we settled on.

And yet, I worried. It was my boy, after all. But I had no choice. I kept phoning Gran, asking how things were going. Strangely enough, they seemed to find their own rhythm together. The week flew by. Once my husband got back, he took over the reins.

I was nearly home from hospital when my sister called, sounding furious. Her daughter is only two, and she’d desperately tried to convince Gran to come and mind her. Gran wouldnt have itsaid two was too little.

She actually pleaded with Gran, almost on her knees, begging for her to stay. But Gran refused!

Youve made use of Gran! Thats what my sister accused me of.

I replied, I was in quite a fix! I couldnt very well take my little lad to hospital with me, could I? I asked you for help too, but you refused. You wanted your daughter with Gran so youd have a break to rest and have fun. Do you see thats entirely different? Can you imagine leaving a tot that tiny with someone Grans age? Take her to her mum and dad.

They simply dont want to watch her. Im always left to do it!

I really think my sisters in the wrong. Theres a world of difference between a two-year-old and a four-year-old. If Id had any other option, I wouldnt have sent my boy to stay with family. But my sister insists I tricked Gran.